Let Freedom ring!

This 4th of July I celebrated freedom like millions of others but I also celebrated a different kind of freedom.  A different kind of independence.

If ever there was a time when my "fly by the seat of my pants" instead of ducks in a row personality served me well its been the last 3 weeks.  Joe said we had so much coming at us at once it was like a tidal wave was just behind us and we were running for our lives.  Yet in a good way.

I am so thankful for the trials, for it is in those trials that truly you see not only what you are made of, but you come to understand how much the people around you mean to you and how little some of the things that you put great importance are in the scheme of things.

And it is in the times when you really don't have a clear cut plan of how to proceed that you find yourself guided by a power much greater than your own.  When you find out what it means when someone says when God closes one door he opens another.  And sometimes, you look back at your situation and see where your own lack of faith, or your own resistance to change has kept the door closed on what could be a new beginning.

Although I truly loved my job and the people I worked with (for the most part), the stress level from the emotions of working in Hospice and the unknowns created by the ebb and flow of business, the changes in personnel, the changes in ownership, to name a few could be at some times overwhelming.  For me the stress showed itself in the blood sugar reading I took on a daily basis. From the day after my job loss, because the day of my blood sugar was pretty extreme on the high end, to now I have had only a couple of numbers over 200 which is amazingly good for a diabetic.  I have had no headaches, no hives which had become a regular occurance and my health has improved dramatically in the last 3 weeks.  The phrase "allergic to work" comes to mind.

Add to that the debt that I have been chipping away at for several years now and what seemed like a paycheck to paycheck existance even though I made a good salary and there were times that I felt like the proverbial gerbil on the wheel spinning continually but never really getting anywhere.

My house had been on the market for almost 3 years.  I had given up on my "dream" of selling it, getting completely out of debt and downsizing dramatically....lets just say an effeciency apartment sounded very appealing to me after living in a house way too big for me and my Yorkie for the last several years since my boys went off to college.  The yard felt unmanangable, no joking aside duct tape was used in several places from holding the air conditioning vent to the wall to holding the mailbox on it's post.  I desperately needed a change yet financially could see no way out.

And then, boom.  Life as I knew it changed dramatically.  I met Joe on Match.com just when I had decided that there were not truly good men out there, all the duct tape came off and actual repairs were made, the rock garden suddenly had flowers, the doorbell which was hanging my a wire suddenly was in place and an amazing transformation took place in my home and in my life.

And now within that short 3 weeks of being laid off from a job I intended to retire from, to selling a house that I had began to think was un saleable, to having the freedom to choose my next step because in a few short weeks, I will be out from under the debt that has weighed me down, the house that was too big for me and still is too big for me and Joe and onto a whole new phase of my life.

My friends are questioning my sanity in moving to an RV.  I heard a rumor there are bets being made as to how long I will last in a 37' home.  I'm sure that most of my family and friends think I am making a mistake.  All I know is I am so excited to be FREE, free from debt, free from a job that I felt I couldn't exist without, free from all the clutter and things that seem to multiply. 

I feel a peace and certainty that I haven't felt in a very long time.  Because what truly matters to me is not the size of the home I live in , or the number of possessions I have accumulated in my 53 years, or the kind of car I drive, or the amount of money I make. What truly matters to me are things money can't buy and a job can't satisfy.  My family, my friends, my health, using my talents, and my faith, something that has never wavered no matter what the circumstance, no matter what the trial.

Today as we arrived at Joe's sisters to choose our new home off a lot filled with RV's of every size and configuration imaginable, I went in the door and said, Here we are unemployed and soon to be homeless and I am on top of the world.   And I meant it.  Because I know that every choice I make at this point is not dictated by my job, or my salary or my location, or any of the other confines that are for the most part, a part of life.

God has given Joe and I a golden opportunity.  A fresh start, a clean slate, a smorgasbord of choices and I for one am going to feast!