Agree to Disagree

A good friend of mine posted on his facebook page this morning that he and his little dog had made the acquaintance of a colt this morning. He talked about how the up and down the fence line, smell each other routine that Baxter and the colt did reminded him of “Church.  Meeting family who are different than I but who are of one breath, the Holy Spirit of God.” I replied to his facebook, hmmm I wonder if that would work for Quincy and the Longhorn behind the RV…I think I might end up with a Yorkie Kabob.

I agree with what Rusty says about all of us being creatures of God.  And I like the concept of meeting people who are very different from ourselves.  What a world it would be if all races and nations and religions and ages accepted each other for who they are instead of what they believe, or the color of their skin, or the God they choose to serve.

I was with my dad this weekend at a little café in Downtown Kingfisher.  Over in the corner, at a circular table was a group of men.  My dad referred to them as “the Circle”.  They were all retired, in their 70’s and 80’s and sitting having coffee and conversation.  I spent the entire breakfast eavesdropping on their coffee circle chat because it was so interesting.  They discussed politics, both national and local.  They discussed sports, mainly the OSU story of last week, they discussed the weather and the crops.   They were mostly on the same page in their feelings about the various topics.  Occasionally, one would disagree and a short debate would ensue before they moved on to the next topic.  And every sentence seemed to start with “years ago, ……….  Years ago, the President and Congress worked together, years ago, the athletes had good moral character and would never have taken drugs, or handouts, etc.  Years ago, the farmers didn’t need million dollar combines and new tech gadgets to grow their crops.  Years ago, the school kids had manners and played outside and didn’t have I phones and computers and you didn’t worry about guns being brought into the school.  Their general consensus could be summed up as “its all the fault of technology and the younger generation that we are in the mess we are in now”. 

Certainly, there are some things I could agree with them on.  I feel like when we started to allow the opinions of a minority of people force the majority of people to conform to their wishes…ie. no prayer in school because one kid was an atheist…or the switch from Halloween Carnivals and Christmas parties to Fall Festivals and Winter Semester Party.  Who cares really what it was called…was it that big of a deal really?  I remember one year as PTA president at my son’s elementary school I got a call and was told that if anyone had a pumpkin at the “Fall Carnival” they would go to the school board and complain.  This person felt that a pumpkin was a symbol of Satan.  I asked if they ate pumpkin pie and she replied, oh yes, it’s our favorite.  I asked if they had ever been to a pumpkin farm.  Oh yes, we went one year and it was really a lot of fun seeing the different pumpkins. What then, is your concern again?  Oh, she replied, maybe I should be clearer. Pumpkins are fine as long as they aren’t carved.  Apparently carving the face was what made it satanic.  Another mom called to tell me she was going to go to the school board to shut down our monthly fundraiser where we had a Skate Night at the local skating rink and part of the admission fee went to the PTA.  The problem was not the skating, but the vile and satanic video games that were located at the skating rink.  I told her that she could just tell her kid that the video games were off limits.  That I didn’t think it was fair of her to try and shut down the whole skating night because she didn’t like the video games there.  For her, it was a matter of it being her right to have her value recognized, even if it meant that the rights of the other 99% of the kid’s parents would not be.  I threw up my hands when I was called on the carpet for having an Easter Egg Hunt at the Spring party which happened to fall right around Easter that year.  I was told that in the future, it was ok to have the hunt, but it had to be called a treasure egg hunt as to not offend the non-Christian parents at the school. 

Now, don’t get me wrong.  I have no problem being politically correct, although I still subscribe to my dads “call a spade a spade” theory.  I have no need to advertise my sexuality, my religion, my preference for Sunflowers, my preferred brand of cereal.  I am not anti gay, anti –any religion other than mine, anti-roses, anti –fruit loops.  I am simply a human being with my own opinions and my own preferences trying to live in the world with people who have opinions and values that differ from mine and remember that we are all essentially all the same, human beings. We may not agree but we can disagree respectfully.

I have friends who are hetero sexual and friends who are gay.  I have friends who are white and friends who are black.  I have friends who are very poor and struggle to get by and friends who are wealthy beyond the imagination.  I don’t distinguish between them and order my favor of them based on these things.  I value the person and what they bring to my life.  I see no need for a Gay Pride Parade.  We don’t have Heterosexual Pride parades.  I see no need for Miss Black America pageants.  We don’t have Miss White American pageants.  Years ago, I was very offended when my husband as a little league coach was accused of being racist because he wouldn’t accept another player onto his overcrowded team.  He didn’t even know the child in question was black, until the league president called and told him that if he didn’t allow the child on the team, the parents had threatened legal action against the league for discrimination.  Reluctantly, we took the child onto our team even though there were several other teams with shortages in their line up.  Our team was a really good team at the time and the parents wanted their child on the team for that reason.   They played the “race card” and won.  A year later, the reverse situation happened.  A white player threatened an all black team with legal action if they didn’t put him on their roster. They didn’t, the child filed a grievance and the league sided with the black team saying they had the right to choose who and how many players were on their team.  That has stuck with me all these years.  

And in some ways, it is those kind of issues, that continue to erode our society.  It sometimes think that some people I know would vote for Satan himself, if he declared himself a member of their political party.  The radio stations I listened to last week going to Oklahoma were full of talk about the OSU controversy and the number of people who were “excited” that OSU was in trouble because they were for an opposing team disappointed me.  I’m sure the opposite would be true had it been an OSU rival that was accused.  And that makes me really sad.  I hate to see people rejoice and revel in the downfall of their opponents, politically, sports wise and life wise.  Yet, it seems to be the norm anymore. 

I don’t have the answer.  I try to stay grounded in my faith and my personal principals and allow others to be who they are without judging them.  I may not agree, I may feel very strongly that someone is wrong in their thinking, but I respect their right to live their life as they see fit.  And I expect the same in return.

This weekend Austin will have a “Strut your pup” parade.  I wonder how many cat lovers have called to complain about the use of their tax dollars going to provide security and the use of city property for a parade that obviously excludes Cats! 

Some days I just want to throw up my hands and exclaim as Rodney King did years ago…”Can’t we all just get along?