Wolf in Sheeps Clothing

My latest match.com matches have totally weirded me out.  First I had the Wacko from Waco.  He claimed to be originally from Sweden.  His emails got weirder and weirder and being the super sleuth that I am it didn’t take long to discover that pretty much everything he told me on IM was a lie.  Well, I did find his wife’s obituary on line so at least that was true.  I am still calculating how he could be 59 but born in 1956 or how his son (who has never been to Sweden)could have taken his profile photo which is of him standing on a mountain in Sweden…photoshop?  Not to mention the non existant company he consults for or the fact that he was born in September but is a Sagitarrius.  I probably should have asked for a refund after that one.  But nooooooooooooooo.  I seem to be a glutton for punishment.  BLOCK SENDER

Next up….man from Oregon on match.com that emails me to see if we can meet for coffee. I emailed back (from my email with my made up name)  and said I thought it might be a little far to go since I’m in OK and that perhaps he had seen the OK and thought it was OR.  I get an return email that says “ I can travel to OK for coffee….love knows no distance.”  SERIOUSLY?   He is also a widower.  BLOCK SENDER

Today I get a “wink”, match.com’s equivalent of I’m interested from a guy in Stillwater.  I “wink” back and we get on the IM and turns out he is from Greece and lives in Stillwater.  His profile says never married  but he tells me in an IM that he has been divorced for 5 years and has custody of his son because his wife has a terminal disease.  OK SO WHICH IS IT?  His message went from so have you always lived in Oklahoma, my response “born in Texas, Ok since age 13” which got the reply “your profile is captivating,  your eyes have the spirit shining through of an angel and surely you are sent to me from God”.  BLOCK SENDER

I seem to be a magnet for weirdos.  At least on line.  I’m beginning to think that Minnesota Mark might have been a total made up person as well.  That would explain the “unexplained” unceremonious dumping.  How do you go from “Hi babe, can’t wait to see you”  to Delete my number in less than a week?  Still pondering how I could have missed the boat so completely on that one!  You would think I would’ve learned my lesson 6 years ago when I ventured into the online thing.  Only Matt the Magician turned out to be exactly who he said he was and a decent man.  The rest were frankly, a little scary.

I got off of Plentyof Fish because it’s a free site and there are some real weirdos on that one.  I thought maybe if I paid for an online dating service that it would be a little less “wacky”.  Match.com has not proved to be.  I also am on Eharmony where out of 75 matches on the 29 dimensions of compatibility, there were only 3 that remotely interested me and those 3 never responded to my invitation to chat.  This one, a so-called Christian site has some pretty lewd profiles.  One guy mentioned sex in his profile at least 12 times.  It was the top spot of what he is thankful for and also the first “hobby” he listed.  NICE!.  One said he drank “several times a day”.  One listed his religious preference as agnostic.  How did that slip through?  Not to mention the 14 matches I got that marital status was “currently separated”.  Ok, that means STILL MARRIED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I got to thinking about deception after this weeks online dating experiences.  Which led me to think about the phrase wolf in sheeps clothing.  Which led me to google to see where that phrase originated.  In case you are wondering here is the story which is an Aasops fable.

A Wolf found great difficulty in getting at the sheep owing to the vigilance of the shepherd and his dogs. But one day it found the skin of a sheep that had been flayed and thrown aside, so it put it on over its own pelt and strolled down among the sheep.  The Lamb that belonged to the sheep whose skin the Wolf was wearing began to follow the Wolf in the Sheep's clothing. So, leading the Lamb a little apart, he soon made a meal off her - and for some time he succeeded in deceiving the sheep, and enjoying hearty meals.   Appearances are deceptive.

Since all three of the men mentioned above had said that I radiate a beauty that could only come from God, I have seriously thought about posting the ugliest, most hideous picture I can find and seeing if I still get “winked” at(match.com),  “smiled at “ (eharmony) and sent a rose (plentyof fish).   Maybe I should change my body type to morbidly obese, say in my profile that I’m addicted to all sorts of drugs and etc. and see how many winks and smiles and roses come my way from handsome strangers.

Deceitful means insincere, hypocritical, underhanded, false, dishonest, treacherous, sneaking, double-dealing, tricky, cunning, and crafty. Such a person is altogether untrustworthy.    Just what I want in a mate!   

I know people personally that have met wonderful people on these sites and in many cases have married them and all is well.  I just don’t think that’s gonna be my experience.  But I’m having “fun”? in spite of myself AND getting good comedy material AND something to blog about.  Surely that’s worth $19.95 and a chance for love!

 Gotta go log in.  Just got a wink!