Filtered

And the truth shall set you free……..or get you sued for slander…Or at least make a few people mad. Because like it or not, the truth sometimes hurts.

After my interview for the paper on Thursday  for publishing on Monday, I was super excited.  As a "closet" writer, the fact that people would have access to my blog and my writing was pretty thrilling.  Never in the 138 blogs I have written have I said anything that would deliberately hurt someone.  Some of my stories are about redemption, an attempt to show that I have come a long way in my faith journey, in regard to forgiveness and patience and kindness and joy.  The events of my past, from the abuse in my first marriage, to the devastation of the end of the 2nd marriage, to the death of my precious mom.  All of my writings, my musings have a point.  They are a catharasis of sort. 

Fast forward to Friday.  I stayed up late on Thursday night reading all 138 blogs, examining them from the point of view of a total stranger, someone that knows nothing about me.   Which means that not only the people that I am friends with, or friends of friends who have given the link to others but total strangers wouldl be able to log on and read about my daily adventures, my daily thoughts. This is not necessarily a bad thing and I am very excited that my writings, my musings will get viewed even more….but at the same time I am a little paranoid about having my “open book” life , open to people I don’t know.  I was in the process of editing to  take out   any names that might be recognizable. Most of the dating “blogs” are pretty anonymous, with the men sited in these for the most part from out of town,or nicknamed. So I’m not too worried about that.

Which got me thinking about the things we say and do every day, the remarks we make to other people that could be hurtful to other people, if they were to hear them. Probably everyone has heard that saying about “if Jesus came to your house today, would you be embarrassed?” The point being we should live our lives in a manner in which we have nothing to hide.

If you know me at all, you know that I am pretty much a what you see is what you get person. I may not always say what I think (if you can’t say something nice, keep your mouth shut) but for the most part, you know where you stand with me. You know my ups and my downs. If I haven’t told them to you personally, you can read my blog and get a pretty good idea of me as a person. Or listen to my comedy performance and get a good picture of the person I am.

So to go back and edit the blog is a catch 22. It feels dishonest to go back and take things out simply because people that normally wouldn’t have access do. Because the feelings I write, the stories I tell, the people I mention are all real. They all have a place in the shaping of what I’ve become.
I suppose I could put one of those disclaimers about “any similarity between the characters mentioned in this blog and people you may know are purely coincidental”…..but much easier I think to “change the names” to protect the innocent.

Unfortunately, someone that should not have even had access to my blog, because never have I given permission for anyone to give this person the link, has unbeknownst to me been reading my blogs.  This person  has taken issue with my account of some of the events that I have mentioned and apparently been upset about it for some time.  Which culmunated in hateful, hateful phone call yesterday with threats to sue me, to RUIN me, to sue the newspaper and destroy my life if the blog link was published. 

I was not given the opportunity to tell this person that I had been editing because said person would not give me the chance. As soon as I hung up, the newspaper called to tell me they wouldn't be publishing the article about me because of a threatened lawsuit.  WOW!  Talk about making a mountain out of a molehill.  Thankfully, they called back and had decided that even without the blog link, my story, my writings, my comedy, my dating adventures alone would be an interesting story.  So Monday the article will be published. 

Words have HUGE power. Words can hurt, words can heal. Words can provoke discussion,words can provoke anger. Words can cause tears. Words can cause laughter (my favorite). Words can be twisted to fit the situation. Words can commend, and words can condemn.

Today, I am more conscious of this than I was yesterday. But it won’t change the blog. Because the blog is the essence of who I am. And like it or not, the people and the stories and the situations that find their way into my blogs are part of my life. I may be a little more careful though.

Imagine for a day that we had a filter that everything we said or thought had to pass through before it got out into the open air. Some of us would have filters that were so clogged up with negative thoughts,and gossip and other junk that we would have to change them several times. Others would be able to go for a while without having anything in theirs.

Our YouthGroup at First United Methodist use this Bible verse as their “creed”.
Psalm 19:14 Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer.
Pretty good words to live by really. And to blog by. And a daily challenge for me and for you too I suspect. Today I’m going to imagine a filter on my mouth. I’m sure it won’t be spotless by any means by the end of the day. But if it’s a little less clogged, then it’s a start.

 And as for "said person" YOU will not stop my writing. I suggest you lose the link to the blog.  I may have crossed a line, but so did you. I beleive its called invasion of privacy.  Works both ways. 

Peace.