Fooled too many times

Thats it. I'm done with the online dating sites for a while. Last one ended on June 30th and I didn't renew. I am online dating site free. Now there are still a couple of guys that I'm still talking to from the sites that I met a while back. One is promising. The other was until tonight when I got an email from him and he referred to his PENDING DIVORCE. Which in my mind means STILL MARRIED. First time in 3 weeks of emails that the word PENDING was used.

I don't know why the rush to get on the sites when they aren't even through with the relationship they are in. I mean I suppose pending could mean that he's been in the process for a long time and for whatever reason there is a hold up and so he FEELS SINGLE even though technically he's not. The scary part about this one is he mentions something about having "travel restrictions" due to the "pending divorce". Somethings got to be up with that. Can someone tell me why a grown man of 56 can't travel..there are no children involved. Well at least it says no kids. But then again it says Single. What really aggravates me most about it is that we have been corresponding for about 3 weeks. We did the whole eharmony back and forth thing for at least a week before we could even email directly. Eharmony is supposed to be a Christian Dating site. Not saying he's not a Christian. But he's a MARRIED Christian. Big difference in that and a SINGLE Christian. At least in my mind.

If this were the first time I have had this happen, I would probably chalk it up to a fluke and not even bat an eye. But this is the 5th time that I can remember that the Single guy has turned out to be married still, or seperated, or married with no intention of divorcing. Its a little frustrating to say the least. They probably have a dating site called marriedbutwantingtodatewomenbehindmywivesback.com If not they should start one because there are plenty of men who would fit that category.

Not saying its just the men either. I have a co-worker whose cousin is divorcing her husband who started an affair with a woman he met on an online dating site. She is also married. They deserve each other. I will say that most of the men I've talked to about the dating sites say that their biggest complaint is the woman lies about her age or her picture isn't current or even her in some instances.

One of the first questions I usually ask is how long have you been single. Because that sort of gives me a clue into how far along in the "healing" process someone is. So if a guy is on the site, says divorced and when I ask they say 4 days, I usually run the other way. I've been the transitional person before and its no fun.

From the single men who are actually married, to the Christian man who informed me he was a Christian but didn't beleive in Christ, to the man in the "transportation industry" that actually was unemployed and put that because in his words "he transported himself back and forth to the mailbox to get his unemployment check" I am tired of the non-truths. Refer to blog Liar, Liar Pants on Fire for another tirade about this subject.

You cannot know a person until you face to face meet them in person. You can email, talk on the phone, chat, text to your hearts content. You can fall in love without ever meeting someone. But until you do, you will never truly know. I have learned this lesson the hard way...several times.

And so I'm done. My next date (with the exception of the one guy met online that I still have hopes for) will have to be with someone I either know, knew or know someone who knows them. I am tired of wasting my time.

Whats that saying about fools? Fool me once, shame on you, Fool me twice shame on me.......With age comes wisdom? I'm feeling old...or at least tired of being duped. Done, Finished, Exiting. Mr. Right can find me the old fashioned way. Offline.